There are two kinds of Journeys in life, those that you set out on with a particular destination or goal and those that just happen to you. The Journeys that just happen, you may not ever recall embarking on, stopping off at a particular stage and there may never even be a destination. In fact you only realise that you’re on the Journey when you take time to reflect and you are amazed at where you have been.
Mine is the second one, which was caused by a result of the first one. These two Journeys began together and are still running together and are very much intertwined, they are my life. This is my story;
February 2007 as a young twenty something college drop out, I found something that I was good at and that I knew I could succeed in. I’d gone from Pot washer to Bar Team leader at my local Toby Carvey. Ever since I decided that this was the path for me, I have always known what I was going to be doing next. Very soon I was given the opportunity of a promotion, about 50ish miles away at the Keighley Toby. This was a big step, not just professionally but personally, I would be moving out of my mum’s home for good, I would be fending for myself in the big wide (wider than I expected ) world.
I had heard that there was a number of Polish people working there, but that was the height of my knowledge about the Polish. I didn’t even know that hundreds of thousands of them had migrated to the UK. I suppose that this unknown group of people sub consciously spiked my interest, because from the very beginning I was excited at learning something new and was eagerly anticipating meeting them.
The Great Polish Handshake and acceptable names
The first thing I noticed is that the men liked a good handshake. Normally I would have gone into work, said “How Do” and cracked on, now I had to greet everyone purposefully (imagine that! an earnest welcome). At first I thought, that the handshake was traditionally a British thing and that this was one of the things they did to integrate (my naivety at it’s peak). It was only on subsequent visits to Poland that I realised I was right and that they had even started doing at home………… fancy that!
Secondly was the name thing. The Previous GM to the one that I went to work for was a very kind and honest man, and he decided that the Polish names would be too much for the people in the area to take. So at some point (not sure how or when) it was decided that they should have more traditional English or stage names for the guests;
Arek became Eric
Kasia- Kate
Marta- Margaret
Dorota- Dorothy
Ect…
Somehow Igor became Lucas….
This wasn’t a bone of contention, it’s just the way it was and the respect they had for this previous GM was immeasurable. I, in turn was given a Polish nickname, I became known as Malenki.
My First words
I distinctly remember learning my first Polish word, it was just a few weeks after I started. Mothers Day (the biggest day of the year), I was hosting and we had turned the bar area into dining to be able to accommodate more guests, this was directly in front of my meet and greet desk. To say we were taking a slamming would be the understatement of the century. Arek was waiting on the section in front of the bar and about 2 hours in he came rushing out of his section past myself and said something under his breath. Clear as day it still comes to me, (only now I’m more educated) with a rolling R at the end “kuuuuvaaarrrr.” No translation needed it was all in the tone….
Some amazing People
In all walks of life, you get on with some people, not so much with others. Believe it or not (sarcasm oozing) this was just the same. I like to think I got on with everyone, but in particular I seemed to get on with the two Basia’s, Dorota and Arek. Ironically the person who I felt disliked me, was Arek’s wife, Kasia (we are best friends these days). Even though I was their assistant manager and I was a little younger, I like to think that we had a very respectful relationship. I used to Love it when one of the two Basia’s made food during the quite parts of the day. It was simple but delicious and was a nice alternative to eating Carvery every day. I still have and use the Polish phrase book they bought me for my birthday that year.
These small friendships lead to an occasional invite to a party, at one of these parties a young Polish woman called Ania, introduced herself to me, she just happened to be the sister of Kasia.
(I just want to say at this point that Polish culture is not just about partying and getting drunk, it just so happens that some of my first and some of my funniest experience come after a drink or two)
If you have ever watched “My Big Fat Greek Wedding”, think to the scene when the Brides brothers tell the Groom to say a certain expression in Greek, that this expression is a good thing and everyone will be impressed (or something to that effect), The Groom repeats this expression perfectly and tells the whole party that he has three testicles. Watch it here!
Well this is what was happening to me!!!
Living quite far away from home I was really honoured and grateful when Arek and Basia B invited me to Basia’s home for Christmas Eve (the main celebration day). They were holding a joint celebration with their families that lived in England. First thing to say is that Polish Christmases are awesome… but that will be a different post, you need to sign up to my blog to find out why!!! I arrived at Basia’s at the same time as Arek and Kasia, I jokingly said to Kasia “how’s your sister?” to which she bit back “ my sister is taller than me, she won’t date you!” ouch!. Anyway it was a really pleasant night, and I did more good than harm.
A week later we had a bit of a New Year do at the Pub, it was only a small event. A few of my own family came, a few of my polish friends came. Somehow I managed to get Ania’s number, she said to me “maybe we can talk when you haven’t been drinking so much” A few days later we went on our first date….
I still at this time did not realise what was to come, if I would ever visit Poland and I had no idea that it would change my outlook on life like it did……….
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Malenki
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